Unafraid

With wings fluttering so divine

on air like a fallen leaf

distance of heights unperturbed

then landing so brief.

Then small movements unfold

wary yet unafraid

seizing the moment of solitude

feeling none of dread.

So when a small hand waved

as if to catch such beauty

taking off majestically

a show of strength almighty.

So fragile but so strong 

so small yet so free

I long for wings and will

to a place where I can be me.

Modern Family

I had been watching three seasons of Modern Family this month even if it means sleeping late and nothing much is done at home, i.e., gardening, washing, or tidying up.

There were moments of exhilaration and bouts of sobbing as I watched each and every episodes of this family-oriented comedy show. I laughed, cried, was ecstatic, surprised, and even stopped to think things over. It was a cacophony of diverse characters, witty lines, and thematic subjects that reflected a modern family. 

And for all the episodes, it was the theme of celebration that I felt I was most wanting. Maybe I miss it because I am alone or maybe because we never celebrate anymore. We had been stricken with financial distress and we decided to amend things by not doing anything. A pity because it is only when we celebrate a milestone that we all see each other. This time, we don't celebrate and we don't see each other, more pity. But the most pitiful of them all would be the seemingly lack of concern and care about the lives around us. We are like strangers to each other. 

Gone were the days we all went out together. Gone were the days we all sat down and chatted together. Gone were the days we celebrated as one family. Modern family anyone?

Walking the Walk

My Life

Been out of blogging for almost a month now. Though it is my one-week off, I still cannot find the time to sit down and write my thoughts. It had been a whirlwind of events, emotionally and my body cannot tolerate such heavy load.

And as I always say, leave me please for I cannot be doing these things forever. I had been giving, through financial and emotional supports, and I am dying. I see myself in the mirror fading and I do wish that I faded now.

And as I always think, I don't want to be here anymore. I wanted to move away, to be so far that nobody can actually reach me. I wanted to be in a place where nobody knows me and that I'll start making friendships, and off to a new life.

And as I always intend, to be away, to be free. To be away not from the people who cares for me but for those who feeds on my generosity. To be free not from my responsibilities but from the shackles of greed that is bringing me down.

These are all talking, an emotional outburst of what had been transpiring for years now. I am looking for ways to escape, not temporarily but permanently, so as to be happy once again. The smiles had long gone and I wanted them back. I will walk the walk so as to gain my happy demeanour once again. 

Of Paulyn and Sally

An Angel from Paulyn ( 20 years ago)

I always keep most of the presents I received from different occasions such as birthdays, New Years, special days, or just being handed something because I was missed. I keep them because they are reminders of my previous encounters with special people and friends. 

A Bear from Sally ( 24 years ago)

Last July, I met two of my former colleagues from a Chinese school where I humbly started as a teacher. Our meetings were filled with laughter and funny anecdotes coupled with some sad news of death and loss. The highlight though was recognizing the fact that we all learned from our experiences and that we had grown  to be better persons compared from years ago. 

(This short entry is dedicated to two of my best buddies. God bless my friends!)