To Survive

During the past months and with the onset of rain and flood, the plants in my garden had been enjoying the respite from the summer heat that blazed through May and to July. Unperturbed by the rain and seeing that nature is taking care of my garden, I took a long rest in caring for my plants.

I did not notice that two of my precious potted flowering trees had clogged drainage. The potted plants were filled to the brim, come heavy rain or sunshine. One of them survived the odds of having too much water. It had grown some molds round the trunk but is still alive. The other flowering plant did not make it. The water that filled it suffocated the plant as there were no space to drain excess water.

My journey through the years could be summarized by the two potted plants in my garden. The one which survived symbolizes my determination to go on with life. The constant fear of living alone in a big house after some bad incidents, the rising hostility of parents against coloured teachers in school, the unfair treatment I get from locals based on my origin and the uncertainty of life itself had been struggles yet sources of my strength to live and to fight for my rights.

Meanwhile, the other plant had symbolized my hopes to be a part of an accepting community. I planted in my mind that whatever great things I do, they will always be regarded as excesses or show offs especially in the place where I work.

I always have this need to shine so I do more than what others can. I always want to prove that colour or race does not play an important part in making great lives work. I always wanted to be better, not to lead a fight but to connect people together. I do fail but I survive.

So when heavy rains come again and fill my life with hard decisions and struggles, I will hold on to my faith. That one day my work will be rewarded and that my life had a meaning, not only to myself but to others. Giving up is not an option for now, but looking at things in different ways will help me survive.