Quotes Unlimited

One night, a sudden urge to review past comments written in my blog prompted me to highlight some of the comments I wrote.  I read and re-read them to remind myself that these writings were not just for the people I shared my thoughts to but also for me, fitting quotes to live by. 

Have a lovely weekend everyone!

Picturesque Ban Pilok

A place called Pilok

up by Kanchanaburi

lies pristine beauty.

Of love eternal

with aspiring forever

the bridge as silent witness.

Bright morning sunshine

clear skies and blue still water

perfect place to be.

Up in the mountain

where the door to heaven lays

opens to lost souls.

A blanket of clouds

that cover the greens and browns

  to sleep mid-morning.

From a bird's eye-view

of roads and trails like weaving

a tapestry fine.

This Little Light

I remember my good Angkong (lolo or grandfather) who established a small restaurant when he settled in the country.  I, being the eldest boy among the grandchildren, became his right hand person. 

He was known as a good cook, especially with fried noodles and I was a witness of his trade and skills. One of my task was to feed the fire with wood and wood shavings.  I would always be excited when sacks upon sacks of wood shavings would be delivered and poured into the dry storage.   Therefore, I became a vigilant knight protecting the cavern of fire so as for it to remained fiery.  I was my lolo's fire, metaphorically speaking, as he busied himself in the kitchen.

When my aunt took my grandfather away so he could be with her in another house, we closed the business.  With my numerous visits to see my lolo, I saw in him the longing to be back in his old home, and that was ours.  He was fading and his happiness was of my short visits as we drank tea and exchanged witty conversations.  To have that comfort zone taken was just not right.

And most recent, I remembered my childhood because of a sad event and then recalled how I made that fire bright and burning inasmuch as cooking made my grandfather alive and well.  I told myself that I should never take that zest away from my spirit, that I should continue to blaze along the trail.  It also became evident that one hiccup does not make our lives unbearable.  

Just like fire, I should continue to be fervent and bright.  Just like light, I should continue to shine forth and lead.  Just like my lolo, we go on with life not because we make more money but because we love what we do.  Take heed so nobody takes that fire away from you.  Be like fire, transform yourself. 

The Meaning of Lost

Getting off the cab one morning, I was waiting at the garage of my student's house when I heard a familiar voice.  "Kat, please take care of your teacher and listen to him," her dad said.

Kat's dad was ill at that time, having been to the hospital for an operation and then recuperating at home.  That morning, they were to go to the hospital leaving me and Kat's brother in their house.

That same day, I received a phone call saying that her dad passed away in the hospital.  I came from the market that time but I cannot help but to cry.  I was astounded, for her dad was just 40 years old.

Last Thursday, something was disturbing me.  I wasn't sure about the news so I sent my student's mum a message.  Yes, there was indeed bad news and that her husband passed away.  I cried since I have known the family for their generosity and faith in me. They even planned to see me for lunch that day, to keep them updated of my teaching and personal life.  And for four years, I would see the dad coming in to school with a smile.  He was 44. 

Both men died due to heart failure and the saddest thing is the families they left behind. Both families have young children, as I am a preschool educator, you could imagine what their ages were and are. 

I am being selfish, for some of my posts were about death and dying, not of other people but of mine.  That even to this day, I am just willing to surrender in due time.  When some lives were taken abruptly, here I am thinking of taking mine.  Forgive me, it is a recurring thought, a sign of weakness and surrender but a very bad thought.

I will pray for the families of my two students while I will also promise not to be selfish and hateful of uneventful things. Life goes on for those who stayed.  Four happy thoughts for everyday: the students that I teach, the remaining family members I have, the people that I love and, the one who loves me most.

Not My Garden Though

It was difficult to move.  Inasmuch as I conditioned myself that change was imminent and good, I was enveloped by deep sadness during my first month living in a smaller space, in a condo, to be specific.  I miss the wide space of my former house, the two rooms filled with books and the sprawling garden with mango trees and critters galore.

I miss my garden and that was the first thing that came into my mind when I decided to help a neighbour landscape the front of their house.  It was just a small space and the choice was that of herbs for cooking. Nevertheless, I was more excited to visit a garden centre once again.

Like a little school boy lost in a candy store, I was snapping photos after photos as I relived the old days when I walked through my garden.  The colours were bright and inviting, and the feelings I had of owning one came back.

What I felt that morning was something money cannot buy and in an instant, I was filled with regrets telling myself that I should have not moved.  The thought was depressing but I fought that. 

There was a reason for moving, for changing and for detaching myself to many of my so called 'interests'. Life goes on even when something is amiss and in the case of a garden, I can always revert back.